Annoyed Delight

His sleek limo drew up to the convenience store/gas station, overfilling the tiny parking lot. My mind jumped from worry over unpaid bills to annoyance at the car’s length and how other customers would have a hard time maneuvering around it.

The back door opened, unattended, and the rider stepped out. My breath caught and froze in my throat. Adonis, Prince Charming and the Ultimate Male all packaged in tailored comfort strode towards the door, opened it and moved to the cooler section. Moments later he brought two chocolate milks to my counter.

I rang them up in silence, head bowed to my task. When I lifted my eyes to give him the total, he drew a breath sharp into himself.

“Oh my dear. What lovely eyes you have. So blue and clear and…perfect.”

My stunned mind refused to process the compliment. First, why would this rich somebody talk to poor nobody me? Second, my work attire wouldn’t attract a lonely fly, let alone a man.

Our gaze met, held and locked. Time stopped. Worry fled. I, insignificant-cashier-of-a-gas-station-convenience-store ceased to know who I am.

“Please,” he coaxed with a smile as broad as Texas and teeth as white as Montana snow. “Come away with me.” He held out his bronzed hand.

Reality vanished as I lost myself in his gaze. Dumbly I placed my chilled un-manicured hand in his large, warm one and allowed him to lead me to his limo. He opened the door, ushered me in, slid next to me and closed the door behind us.

“Drive on,” he said with a cheery wave. The driver asked for no directions. Perfect Man offered none.

Within moments, we pulled up to a Tudor-styled mansion, black beams stark against gleaming white. I followed my tender captor into the house and down a long, spacious hallway. He opened a far door, and stepped aside, allowing me to precede him.

A lone wine-colored loveseat adorned the room, facing a wall-sized screen. “Sit,” he invited, before joining me on the couch. With a gentle snap of fingers a movie began.

I gasped, its sound loud and echoing in the room, as my life from birth to present rolled by. He grasped my hand. When I lied, he squeezed it. When someone lied to me, he held it harder. My misdeeds, others’ misdeeds against me, happy times, sad times, embarrassing times all rolled, tumbling together like the Niagara, across the screen. Every hope and dream exposed. His grasp on my tainted hand never lessened. The movie ended, showing us sitting on the loveseat in the same room. I turned to him for explanation.

“Come,” he beaconed again. We moved to a side door and into another room. Gold velvet blanketed every wall, warming and illuminating the bareness. We sat together on another loveseat, of gold crushed-velvet.

Another snap of fingers. Another movie. His life. His hopes and dreams. Suddenly my figure waltzed onto the screen.

My back stiffened. My hands clenched. How did I get there? Why was I there? He placed an arm about me, pulling me back against him, giving my shoulders a gentle squeeze.

“Ah,” his contented sigh bushed my ear. “This is my favorite part.”

Rainbow of Life

Pink-slipped.
My breath whooshes away like an unknotted balloon.
I sag into my chair, clutching the slender paper with numbed fingers.
Dreams derailed.

Orange-clad
Arms cross to pillow my aching head.
Drugged lethargy coaxes me into hopeless stupor.
Stunned surrender.

I tumble into nothingness
Landing on feet as silent as death.
I find myself centered in a gigantic room.
Mirrored walls catch and toss myriads of chandelier lights.
Brilliant bewilderment.

My dressed-for-success suit
Morphs into a luxurious satiny gown
With a rainbow of diaphanous scarves veiling its skirt.
Rapt wrappings.

A man approaches, impeccably groomed, perfect of form.
“Shall we dance?” His melodious voice ripples
Over my weary soul as a stream in the desert.
Gently he closes warm fingers over my own chilled ones.
Sensitive stranger.

He draws me into a waltz.
We glide over the polished floor, whirling and swirling, feet in perfect accord.
Matched mates.

He plucks a scarf from my skirt, enveloping us in its pinkness.
I am a child – carefree – dancing in my father’s arms.
I throw my head back as laughter bubbles up
And out of me, rolling all adult burdens away to oblivion.
Incandescent innocence.

Vibrant orange
Slides through his bronzed fingers,
The flaming brilliance pulsating youthful optimism.
Eternal energy.

Serene blue
Swaddles us in contentment as life dreams
Are met and filled, marching in expected precision.
Loving husband, good job, comfortable home.
Goals gained.

I glance down and gasp.
The gray of disappointment
Swallows innocence, energy and serenity.
My steps slow and I lose the timing of the dance.
Black sorrow and brown doubt fuse with the gray.
The tortuous trio circles me, weaving their lethal pattern,
Smothering my heart to
Dreadful despair.

Why did God upset the life’s harmony
By placing a defective newborn in my arms,
Knowing my mate would abandon us in the crisis?
I weep in my partner’s arms, my feet stumbling,
Forgetting the steps which had flowed from me moments before.
Piercing pain.

Gently we sway together as sorrow surges and ebbs,
Surges and ebbs through my heart.
He leads, I care not where.

I press my storm-ravished face into his chest,
His heartbeat thuds against scorched cheeks.
I sense his love as he imparts relaxed strength.
Confusion and doubt dribble from my heart.
He holds me tighter and tighter in his
Granite Grip.

Soothing green
Laves off desolation as we twirl the whys of life away.
I embrace the disappointments that shifted my vision from internal
To external, now conscious of other shattered hearts.
I laugh at hurts that sharpened my senses for other suffering souls.
Healing hope.

Yellow joy
Surges through my being as my partner spins me faster and
Faster, wrapping us in a cocoon of golden ecstasy.
Glorious glimmer.

Dazzling light Radiates from my unveiled dress, a beautifully
Beaded and flowing wedding gown.
I grin at my partner, who has led me with unfaltering steps
Through this dance of life.
My forever bridegroom.
Jesus.

I Cried...the Lion Died

Tonight I watched Chronicles of Narnia on Disney. This is the 3rd time I've watched the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. I enjoyed every moment until Aslan left camp to go to the Witch's and the girls followed. He told them to go back and they insisted on staying with him. He thanked them and said "I could use the company for awhile."

"I could use the company for awhile." That one simple sentence hit me with all the force of God's truth. Jesus wants to be my friend and he wants me to be his friend as well. I get so busy with life's busyness...I forget he wants my friendship.

He wants my friendship. Like old friends sipping iced tea on a hot day and reminiscing of memories...he wants to sit with me...share life with me...share secrets...mine and his.

Tonight I repented for taking for granted the best friend I've ever had...Jesus.